Posts tagged self-esteem

Becoming More Confident

0
387 days
by in Motivation

Becoming More Confident

Have you dreamed of becoming more confident? How do you feel about yourself? Are you always deferring to other people because you see them as better than you? It’s time to stop.

There are a few things you can do to build your self-esteem and become more confident that are quick and easy.

Quick Steps to Becoming More Confident

1. Ask a trusted friend to list your top five character traits. This is a confidence builder in itself!
Don’t trust just anyone. Ask someone who has known you for a while and whose opinion you trust.

2. Look at the list. If you really believed you had these character traits would you feel inferior? Then why do you? If you trust the person whom you asked to help you, why would you not believe what he/she says?

3. Keep a success journal. This is my favorite way to help my clients build their self-confidence. Start by writing down your successes over your entire lifetime. Then start keeping a list of successes for the day EVERY NIGHT. At first you might have to write down small successes. For example, “I turned down the cheesecake at work today.” Later, though, as you begin to see yourself as you really are, you will find yourself writing things like, “Asked the boss for a raise and got it!” This is key on your journey to becoming more confident.

4. Look at all the good around you. Keep a gratitude journal as well. List everything that is good in your life. Each night, update the list with the things you are grateful for THAT day. Knowing what is right in your life can give you courage to be yourself.

5. Don’t be a doormat! Learn to say “no” to things, people, and events that do not build you up. If you always feel bad about yourself after being around Jeannie, then avoid her like the plague.

For more ways to becoming successful, see Achieving the Dream.

Becoming more confident takes time, so start today to build a happier you!

So Why the Drama?

3
851 days
by in Uncategorized

We are adults, right? The last time I checked, I was an adult. I have all the adult responsibilities. Mortgage? Check. Credit card bills? Check. Utilities? Check. Drama? Che…Wait! That’s not an adult trait, is it? Nope. At least, it shouldn’t be.

Adulthood is a time in our lives where we should be able to be ourselves without worrying what others think. This was (still is, to be honest) a big problem for me. From looking around, I can see that it is still a problem for others as well.

What I am coming to learn and finally accept is that if you are true to yourself and your values, you do not need to worry about what other people think. It’s between you and God.

Too many times, we (including myself here!) get hung up on something we perceive that a friend has done to us. In all reality, the person didn’t “do” it to you, you just perceived it that way. You cannot be in another human’s mind to figure out his/her motive.

I knew someone who “perceived” herself into misery. If she liked a couch and her sister bought it, she accused her sister of buying it so that she could not have it. When her neighbor painted his house the color she had mentioned (in passing, mind you) she thought he had done it on purpose. Why she thought that people had these evil intentions toward her, I have no idea. She was a sweet, loving person. I bought into her dramas until she turned it on me. Her birthday fell on a Friday one year, and so I decided to have her party (yes, my family and I were throwing her a party) on Saturday. She accused of us moving her birthday celebration on purpose to hurt her. I truly loved this individual, but in the four years since I have talked to her, I have NOT missed her drama one iota.

Take a moment to consider that most people do not make you the center of their world. Just try to cut them (and yourself) a break. NO more drama! I know this is certainly my goal.

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