Reformat Your Life Today
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The Year of Living Dangerously: Giving Generously
0247 days
by Kristie Dean
in Uncategorized
Giving Generously
Giving generously – how many of us consider what that means? In this time of economic hardship, it is easy to just look after ourselves instead of reaching out to help someone else in time of need. I hope you, the regular readers of my blog, will consider giving to this family in need. Lee Allen Pollard is in the final stages of carcinoid cancer. A few years ago, Lee became disabled and he and his wife had to choose between keeping a roof over their children’s heads or paying the life insurance. They made the decision to drop the life insurance until they could get back on track. During this time, Lee received his diagnosis.
This family means so much to me. They would give to any one of us. Here is the donation page.
Three Questions For Success
0306 days
by Kristie Dean
in Uncategorized
There are three questions that enable any person to add success to his or her life. Watch below to find out what these questions are and how YOU can apply them to your life.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8hFA1Ov6sU 435 355[/youtube]
The Year of Living Dangerously: Make Someone’s Day
0318 days
by Kristie Dean
in Uncategorized
“No man has a prosperity so high or so firm, but that two or three words can dishearten it; and there is no calamity which right words will not begin to redress.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
“How does making someone’s day fit into living dangerously?” a friend asked when I told her of July’s plan. It’s a good question, but the answer is simple. “How does it NOT fit in?” I replied. The entire purpose of the year is to stretch my boundaries and help me focus on the good things in life. Finding someone each day to compliment sincerely will stretch those boundaries, I’m sure. To be fair, complimenting people is not something I’ve never done – in fact, I do it a lot. But by focusing on finding a heartfelt compliment to give someone each day, I hope to make it a HABIT.
There is nothing that can be gained from being a criticizer of people. You might see it as “constructive” but most of the time it is FAR from constructive. I’m not saying there isn’t a time or place for constructive criticism; I’m just saying that you need to think long and hard about what you are going to say. Will it really help the person or will it cause them pain? Too often we are quick to dash other people’s dreams. “Oh, that won’t work.” or “Why are you spending so much time doing that?” What good can come out of those types of comments?
So for the entire month of July, I plan to compliment someone every day. The tricky part is that it has to be a SINCERE compliment – straight from my heart. My first compliment goes out to a reader, Amy Barbour, for being the winner of the Year of Living Dangerously book giveaway. Way to go, Amy!
Check back to see how it goes!
Taking Action vs. Talking
0354 days
by Kristie Dean
in Uncategorized
Taking action...image courtesy of http://free-clipart.net/
Action vs. Talking
I was on Facebook today and saw a post by a friend asking for help with a situation. About ten people posted they would help out, but I only saw one person asking specific information, and then telling how she would help. I’ve noticed this in “real life” too. Some people say they will help, while others just take action. Who would you rather have on your side? I’d much rather have the person who will help on my side.
Action-oriented
There’s an old axiom that if you want something done, give it to a busy person. It has been my experience that this is definitely the truth. People who are busy take consistent action. When I’m busy, I find that I’m more focused, and that I’m better able to handle whatever comes my way. Consider which type of friend you are-are you the one who wishes to help, or the one that does help? It makes a difference.
How can you learn to take action? A few simple steps:
- Ask a person what they need. Don’t accept, “I’ll let you know,” unless you know the person will get back to you. Offer a few suggestions if they seem stuck. “Perhaps we can bring dinner by tomorrow night?” or “Would you like me to take the kids back to my house?” are some examples of asking specifically
- If they can’t come up with anything you can do to help, think of what you would need in that situation. Then offer to do that. When a person is worried or grief-stricken, he or she isn’t concentrating.
- Do it. Whatever you’ve offered, take action and do it
Action = SatisfACTION
I’m much more satisfied when I can point to specific things I’ve done rather than to things I “meant” to do. When you take action, you are showing that you care about a person. So, the next time someone tells you they need help, don’t just offer the “If you need anything, let me know” phrase, but actually find out what they need, and do it. Take action!
Grief and Grieving
0388 days
by Kristie Dean
in Uncategorized
Waves of Grief
Grief is like a wave
Grief is like swimming in one of those giant wave pools. Sometimes the waves of grief subside and you can smile, float on your back, and stare at the clouds. At other times, seemingly out of nowhere waves of pain strike relentlessly one right after the other, almost drowning you under the onslaught. And even though other people are near, it doesn’t seem like anyone can reach you when you are going under.
Many people put on a happy face and don’t really share what is going on. Or we try to minimize our grief. “It’s okay,” we say, “I’m doing better.” Yes, if better means today you made it through the day without breaking down. If you have friends that know what’s going on, you alternate between wanting to talk about it and pushing them away. “What is wrong with me,” you wonder. “Why can’t I get past this?” That’s part of the problem, I think. We feel like we have to “get past” grief.
Experience Grief
I disagree. I think that sometimes we need to stay in the moment and really experience the grief. Really feel the pain. Otherwise we wind up dead inside, emotionless zombies. How can we experience our grief?
One way I do it is through music. Recently, I’ve found myself playing two songs over and over. The first one “I Would Die for That,” shares the experience of a woman who wants children.
The other one is a song that talks about life after a miscarriage. “I’ve been waiting for you for such a long time; you’re always on my mind…Lost you before I found you, gone before you came, but I love you just the same.” By the time those words are through playing, I’m able to let go and cry. Usually I feel much better afterwards. I’m able to rest in the waves instead of drowning in them. And it helps to get through that day, until the next wave cycle hits.
Grief is a personal thing, and many of your friends may not know how to approach you. Make it easy for them by telling them the truth. “Today is a bad day.” That’s not so hard to say. We are so conditioned to telling white lies to hide our real feelings. Be authentic in your grief today. You’ll start to find that there is more and more time between the waves of grief.
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